Title: On The Rebound
Author: Rakina
Summary: Answers the prompt: 74) Because of a wayward student prank Snape and Lupin can't move more than a few steps apart from each other for one month.
Rating: M/PG13
Pairings: Severus Snape/Remus Lupin
Warnings: feeds the ‘Snape has a beautiful cock’ myth. If you squint it might have some watersports element, but not really. I don’t think it’ll squick most people, but who am I to judge? So I mention it for the urophobic (is that a word?).
Feedback: corieltauviqueen@yahoo.co.uk
Beta: the_senjou
Author Notes: Written for the Master and the Wolf 30-minute challenge.
Disclaimer: The world of Harry Potter, its characters and settings are the copyrighted works of J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros., her publishing companies and affiliates. No profit was made from the writing of this story.

On The Rebound
By Rakina

“Weasley and Weasley, who else could it have been?”

Fred and George spun around to find themselves facing the dark-robed Potions professor. If anybody was going to catch them in the act, it would have to be Snape, of course.

“Explain why Mr. Fallowfield is currently turning purple whilst sitting on the toilet, unable to move?”

“He can move, sir,” George protested. “He just can’t get off the toilet.”

“And why would that be?”

“Gummi-bum glue,” Fred answered, sounding enthusiastic about the whole thing. “It’s a new prank we’ve invented.”

“And it’s a new detention you’ve earned, as I’m sure you’ll be unsurprised to hear,” Snape replied. “Every evening this week with Filch. 7 o’clock sharp. And don’t be late, or I shall forcibly stick your own arses to something more painful than a toilet seat, understand?”

Fred and George left, muttering. Snape turned towards the unfortunate Ravenclaw know-it-all and the task of countering the Weasley twins’ latest dubious substance. He couldn’t help admiring the pranksters, whom he suspected often developed their products in his Potions labs.


“That was a bit much, Fred.”

“Yeah. I think he’s been getting a bit above himself lately.”

“We could get our own back easily.”

“Easily. How?”

“Conjoino. That charm Flitwick was blabbering on about last lesson. Bonds wizards whether they want it to happen or not.”

“Cool! Any idea who we should bond him to?”


“No, he likes Filch. It should be someone he doesn’t like. Make him suffer a bit, until he can lift the spell.”

“Right. Lupin!”

“Yeah… he’s always moaning about Lupin. He wanted that Dark Arts job, and Lupin’s appointment seems to be a personal insult.”

Two wands raised, pointed back towards Snape where he was bent over Fallowfield, and two voices intoned ‘Conjoino’ in perfect timing.


Snape stalked into the Great Hall for dinner. He was hungry, tired and strangely on edge, though he wasn’t sure why. To make matters worse, the only free seat was next to the blasted werewolf. Damn Dumbledore and his altruistic ‘jobs for unfortunates’ policy. Or perhaps not - he was a beneficiary of that himself.

Severus sank into the seat and started to serve himself, piling steak and kidney pudding onto his plate. He hardly noticed the strange wash of feeling as he’d sat down; it was just another annoyance at the end of an annoying day. The pudding was pure heaven, though - comfort in food form.

Lupin looked up in surprise, gasping at the wave of feeling that washed over him as Severus sat down. He was used to Snape’s presence making him feel uncomfortable. He chose not to examine the reasons for that. He turned back to his meal. Lupin loved Hogwarts’ dinners; after years of managing on cheap food the sumptuous feasts and ample servings were something he enjoyed.

Severus ate hungrily. The pudding was filling. Its warming presence under his ribs was making him feel a little better, a little calmer. As he cleared his plate, he wondered what the house elves would serve for pudding; hopefully something light after such a heavy meal.

As if to answer his question, desserts popped into being. Severus winced.

In front of Snape and Lupin a huge platter of blancmange had appeared. It was a giant, wobbly green milk-jelly in the shape of the giant squid. The squid cavorted among wavelets fashioned from whipped cream. It was too much for Snape’s sensibilities.

“Oh, no. That’s just too horrific for words!” he snapped, standing up.

Snape turned to do his trademarked flounce from the hall, thereby telling everyone who would look - that is, the entire school - that the pudding was a personal insult to a man of taste and education. Severus strode off.

That is, he would have stridden off, if he could. In reality, he was anchored very firmly to the table. The forward movement resulted in his body recoiling as if pulled by elastic, and worse, it resulted in Remus Lupin falling sideways off his chair and ending up at Snape’s feet. Severus goggled down at him.

“Unhand my robes, Lupin!” he yelled.

“I assure you, Severus, I am not touching your robes,” Remus replied mildly. It wasn’t entirely true, as he was sitting on the hem of the robes right now.

“This is not funny.”

“No. It’s not.” Remus was having trouble keeping a straight face. It hadn’t felt funny when he’d been yanked sideways out of his chair, but the sight of Snape’s affronted face was making it pretty silly now.

“Get up and I will return to my dungeons and sanity.” Severus pushed Remus’ shoulder with his hand, agitatedly.

Remus rolled sideways to get off the robes, but he couldn’t get up, he was in danger of dissolving into laughter. No, it was safer here on the floor.

“Is everything all right?” Albus’ voice sang out.

“Quite all right, Headmaster,” Snape replied. Of course, the old coot would have to join in and make a minor problem into a major crisis.

As Lupin was now off the robes, Severus turned to leave again. And rebounded once more. His eyes shot around suspiciously. This was a hex of some kind, it had to be. “Get up, Lupin,” he snarled.

Remus heard the tone of voice and knew it was time to stop laughing. Snape was about to explode and that wasn’t a pretty sight, especially in the Great Hall. He stood up.

“Follow me,” Snape said, and tugged at Remus’ sleeve.

“Make your mind up,” Lupin said. “You wanted me away from you earlier.”

“We’re stuck together,” Snape rasped. As he said it he knew who had done it. Stuck. Gummi-bum glue. Weasleys, of course. “Come to the dungeons and we’ll soon sort it out.”

Snape had been right so far, but not with this prediction. Divination wasn’t his strong point. The two men spent a forced evening together and Snape would never have admitted to the enjoyment he felt. Chess was good, they were well-matched. They even had things in common - who’d have thought it?

But now he had another problem. “I need the toilet,” he informed Lupin.

“Oh, right, Severus. Well, I’ll come too.”

“Of course you will. There is no choice to be had.”

Severus led the way and Remus followed. He had to keep within two strides of Severus in order to prevent more rebounds.

Severus was pointedly ignoring him, cold-shouldering him. Remus tried to look everywhere but where the Potions master was rummaging with his robes. Because Remus didn’t want to look at Snape’s cock, of course he did not. But the more he tried not to, the more his eyes wandered until…

“Bloody hell!” He couldn’t help the cry.

Severus frowned at him. Remus’ eyes were still fixed on the cock Severus was holding, pointing into the toilet. It shouldn’t have been erotic watching another man piss, but Severus’ cock was just beautiful , even in that moment: long and thick, a nice tan-rose colour, not circumcised, and fascinating….

“When you’ve quite finished…”

Remus hadn’t finished. His eyes were glued, as firmly as Fallowfield’s bum had been. His trousers were too damn tight.

Severus saw it. He saw the light in the wolf’s eyes and knew it for what it was: pure, animal lust. Suddenly, he was slammed against the bathroom wall. Lupin was rubbing his hard prick against Severus’ arse, panting hot breath into his ear.

“You’re so fucking hot, Severus. I don’t care how I’ve found out. I just need you, now!”

Severus tried to protest, but he didn’t try very hard.


One month later Snape was relieved, or so he told himself, to be able to leave his bed with Remus still inside it. He went to the toilet alone.

But things were different now. And it was the Weasleys’ fault.

Perhaps he’d let them off detentions for the rest of the year… if not their entire school career.