The Answers He Needs

by Blackonyx_angel

beta’d by Kristofer

A/N: Um... here’s another one! Hope you like. R&R... please.

Challenge: 3) Snape uses the Veritaserum Potion on Lupin and discovers surprising things about one of his most hated enemies...

Snape handed Lupin the Wolfsbane. He watched with grim satisfaction as Remus downed the potion with nothing more than a grimace of distaste. Snape waited almost a minute before he was sure the Veritaserum had kicked in. “Do you know what I put into your potion?”

“No.” Remus sighed and looked up. “Yes.”

Snape nodded. “What’s your full name?”

“Remus Julius Lupin.”

“How old are you?”

“Thirty-seven.” Remus raised an eyebrow. “Are we done with the pointless questions?”

Snape nodded once, then started in on the questions he had no answers to. “Why did Potter and Black hate me so?”

Remus looked up at him, eyes slightly wide, but compelled to answer. “You were a Slytherin and refused to be impressed by Sirius and James.”

“Why did Black send me to the Shrieking Shack? To kill me?”

“I don’t know the real reason. He claimed it was in a moment of anger and he didn’t think of the consequences. But James and I always thought it might have been to kill you.”

“So you had nothing to do with it?”

“No. I hadn’t even known until afterwards. I remembered seeing you just as I was turning, though. I thought I had been seeing things.”

Snape sneered. “And I suppose Potter didn’t know about it either.”

“He didn’t. Paddy told Prongs afterwards. You were already at the Whomping Willow when Prongs made it out the Entrance Hall.” Remus slumped back against the chair, resigned to answering Snape’s questions, whether he liked it or not. As long as they continued on this line, he was fine, for the most part.

“‘Paddy’? ‘Prongs’?”

“Padfoot, Prongs, Wormtail, and Moony.”

Snape’s eyes narrowed, remembering Harry’s third year and that odd bit of parchment.

Remus saw him make the connection. “The Marauders. We made a map of Hogwarts. Knew all of it’s secret passages and hallways and shortcuts.”

“Why those names?”

“The others were because of their Animagus. James was a stag, Prongs. Peter was a rat, Wormtail. You know Sirius was a dog, Padfoot. I’m Moony because I only show during the full moon.”

Snape sat down. “Why did you hate me?”

Remus blinked. “I never hated you.”

“Really,” came Snape’s sarcastic drawl.

“Really. Sirius and James hated you. Peter followed James in everything. I never hated you, I didn’t like what they did to you, but I wanted to keep them as my friends.”

“Was it worth it?”

“Yes. No.”

Snape quirked an eyebrow. “No?”

“Sometimes, I think that things would be different if I had stopped them instead of keeping quiet. Sometimes I think you wouldn’t have become a Death Eater had I stopped them, had I stood up to them. Sometimes I think I wouldn’t have to have gone through all of that pain. The pain of losing all of them in the span of a day.”

“What was so special about their friendship?”

“They were the first people to not care about me being a werewolf. They went out of their way to make it easier for me. By becoming Animagi, I had company on the full moon. I no longer had to stay cooped up in the Shack. No longer had to hurt myself. Padfoot and Prongs kept Moony in line.”

“You talk as if they’re separate entities.”

“We always saw them as such.”

“When did they become Animagi?”

“Fifth year.”

“Do you miss Black?”

“Yes. I miss the old Sirius. He wasn’t the same after Azkaban.”

“What about the Black that came out of Azkaban? Do you miss him?”

“How can I not?”

“What do you mean?”

“I loved him. I thought him lost to me. But then he escaped from Azkaban and I finally had him back.”

“You loved him?”

“Very much, yes.”


Remus gave a wan smile. “I don’t know. I never did know.”

“How long?”

“Since sixth year.”

“He became your mate?”

“In a way. Padfoot couldn’t become Moony’s mate, cross species. But Sirius could be mine.”

“And while he was in Azkaban?”

“Always one nighters. Most people don’t take kindly to werewolves after all.”

“And when he came back?”

“Moony was grateful. She had company again, one of her ‘pack’. I... I had my lover, my friend back.”

“You guys did become lovers again after Harry’s third year?”

“Not right after, no. We worked on our relationship though. You can’t go from not seeing somebody for twelve years to being their lover, not if you want to have a relationship that works.”

“So when did you?”

“Beginning of Harry’s fifth year.”

“Was he the only person you’ve had a relationship with?”


“Who else?”

“Peter Pettigrew.”

Snape raised an eyebrow. “I would never have guessed. Peter?”

“Yes, Peter. During our fifth year, actually. It wasn’t much, but it was still a relationship.”

“You say you never hated me. If you don’t hate me, then what do you feel toward me?”

“It’s mixed, nothing’s definite.”

Snape raised an eyebrow but didn’t say anything on it. “You called Moony a she. Why?”

“Because Moony is a female.”

Snape nodded. “Simple answers for simple questions. What’s it like when you transform?”

Remus’s eyes widen again. He could feel the Veritaserum starting to wear off, but not fast enough. “It hurts like all bloody hell. You can feel everything shifting, moving, morphing.”

“What exactly does the Wolfsbane Potion do? Most say it tames the wolf.”

“It doesn’t tame the wolf, it suppresses it. Wolves aren’t meant to be tamed.”

“Why do you say that?”

Remus shrugged. “A tame wolf is a broken wolf.”

“I’ll be sure to remember that. If there was a cure for lycanthropy, would you take it?”

“I... don’t know. I’ve never thought of it, never hoped for it, never wanted it.”

“Is it really a curse, then?”

Remus raised an eyebrow. “You want to find out?” The Veritaserum had worn off. Remus couldn’t find a reason not to answer Snape’s questions, and he didn’t really mind talking to the man.

Snape stood up, knowing the Veritaserum had worn off from Remus’s answer. He turned to leave.

“Sometimes it is. Sometimes it isn’t.” Snape turned beck to face Remus. Remus’s amber eyes met his. “Sometimes I enjoy being Moony. It’s a whole new world when I’m looking through her eyes. It’s a form of release. But sometimes, I hate it. It’s the only time I can’t control myself. It’s one of the few things in my life I can’t control. That’s why I work so hard at controlling my emotions, my surroundings.”

“Why are you still answering my questions?”

“Because, Severus. I don’t mind talking, I don’t mind people asking me things. I’d rather talk about it than not. Only Sirius knew that though, everyone else thinks it’s a sore subject.”

“Is it a sore subject, then?”

“It’s not, not really.”

“You want to talk about your lycanthropy?”

“Yes. It... I don’t know, but it helps in a way.”

Snape sat back down and eyed Remus for a second. “So talk.”

Remus smiled at Snape and started to talk.

As Snape fell asleep that night he thought about Remus and the way Remus had acted toward him that day. Maybe he could learn to treat Remus differently. Maybe they could become something more.


The End

A/N: :-D yeah, it’s kind of odd in the beginning... I guess... who can see Snape needing those answers so much that he’d spike Remus’s potion? *raises hand* *cuddles Sev* I think he’s just a lost little boy way deep down inside... and I mean WAY deep down. No, deeper.